North Dakota and 17 cents

current song- karma payment plan by modest mouse

I had to work this morning from 4am to 9 am, that's what I call the shit schedule. It's not that bad because then once you are done you can go home and not have to work the normal hours in the evening. It was nice as hell today and I really wanted to do something so I took my dog for a walk. I got back home and laid down and ended up sleeping pretty much the bulk of the day. It was pretty lame but that's what you do when you work the shit schedule. A few hours ago I went out the local subway, which doesn't really mean anything because there are about 4 subways around here and if you drive 8 miles there are many more. I went to one of the local Subways to get a delicious veggie sandwich and as I pulled into the driveway this dude keeps on looking at me. I knew he was probably going to ask me for money or something so I stayed in my car and pretended that I was doing something important. I get out of my car and this fucker walks up to me like he's my boy and is like "hey baby, what up yo. Hey man, can you do me a favor?" I knew this was coming. He wanted to know if I could give him some money and if I could go 'over there to the Texaco' so that I could give him a jump because his car was broken down or something. He wanted money so that he could get hot dogs for his kids and then he said something about child support, I didn't really pay attention. I tried as hard as I could to play dumb but it's hard to find anyone in this day and age who does not know what 'money' or a 'jump' is. I was then asked if I could use my credit card to buy hot dogs. What the hell? I was like, "well, I really can't right now because I am meeting my mom here. She's from out of town. He asked me where she was from and I said "North Dakota." I'm not sure if he knew where that was, but then he was like "c'mon man, it'a only take a second man!" Yeah, it'll only take a second for him to steal my shit. So I said, "yo, maybe after I meet my mom. I don't know when she'll be here so I gotta stay right here." then he was like "damn man, gimme some change then." at this point I was glad to give him some change so he would get the fuck out of my face. I know this sounds quite harsh but I know who really needs money or help and who doesn't, you know the saying "beggars can't be choosers"? I reach into my change box which I had just cleaned out the night before as a matter of fact and gave him something like 17 cents. He took it and then looked at it and was like "aight man you can have this back!" and then walked away. Then next time someone comes up to me and has a story like that I am going to be the first one to ask for change.